


What You Said

by Three_Oaks



Series: Oaksy's Prompt Game [13]
Category: Mission: Impossible (Movies)
Genre: Ilsa Faust has no time for Ethan's shit, Love Confessions, M/M, Misunderstanding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-30
Updated: 2020-03-30
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:01:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23392159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Three_Oaks/pseuds/Three_Oaks
Summary: Ethan hears Benji saying he wanted to leave. Of course it was what he meant. What else could it be?Day 13:Overheard
Relationships: Benji Dunn/Ethan Hunt
Series: Oaksy's Prompt Game [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1676299
Kudos: 45





	What You Said

Ethan had cake. Great cake, from that bakery he’d found in that one stakeout twelve years ago. That cake had been the only thing that had kept him alive, back then. He half-jumped, half-walked the steps up to the safehouse. Benji would like that cake.

He walked to the kitchen, and stopped.

“I really think you should tell Ethan, Benji.” Ilsa’s voice was muffled by the door, but he could still hear the genuine concern in her tone.

“I know, I know… It’s been on my chest for so long, and I can’t stand it anymore. I can’t keep living like this. But I’m just… scared of how he’ll react, I guess.”

Ethan barely stopped himself from crushing the fragile carton box of the cake. He walked away, making sure they wouldn’t hear his steps. Until found himself in his room, still holding the cake. Like an idiot.

Benji had finally decided to leave.

Ethan wanted to throw the cake against the wall.

Benji was scared of his reaction? He was right. So was Ethan. But it was wrong. If Benji wanted to leave, he’d make it easy for him.

***

“We don’t need you, Benji. Just stay back.”

“But the plan…”

“Ilsa can do it.”

“Erm… alright. Do you want me to do anything else while you’re all working the mission, risking your lives?”

“No. There’s nothing you can do.”

Ethan left the safehouse without looking back.

***

“Ethan, are you the one who bought that cake? It’s the best thing I’ve ever had. I want to drown in it.”

Ethan shrugged.

“… should I not have eaten the cake?”

“I don’t really care, Benji.”

***

“Ethan? Can I talk to you?”

He didn’t answer.

“Ok. You’re still not talking to me. Have I done something?”

“Why do you say that?”

“Come on, you know why!”

“No, I really don’t.”

“Alright. Fine. I’m sorry for bothering you.”

Ethan watched as Benji left the room, eyes firmly away from his.

***

“What the hell, Ethan?” Ilsa asked, murder in her eyes.

“What?”

“You’ve been behaving like the worst asshole for the whole week.”

“I’m…”

“And now Benji is crying. Happy?”

“No! Of course not. That’s not what I wanted to…”

“Oh, so you were doing it on purpose. Please tell me, what did you want to do?”

“I just…. I just wanted to make it easier for him.”

“Make it easier for him to what? Stab you?”

“To leave. I heard you in the kitchen the other day. So I thought… ”

“Ethan. I don’t know what you think you heard, but if you don’t go apologize to Benji now, I will shoot you in the head.”

Ethan didn’t doubt she would.

***

“Benji? Can I come in?”

“Yes! Yes, just give me a second.”

Benji opened the door. He still wasn’t looking at him. Ethan wished Ilsa had shot him in the head.

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. You don’t have to…”

“I do. I… I heard you in the kitchen the other day.”

Benji froze.

“I always knew it would happen. I mean, have you seen yourself? There’s just no way it could work. It’s best for both of us, really, if you leave.”

Benji started crying.

“You could just have said you weren’t interested, Ethan.”

“That I’m not… What?”

“Oh, are we playing it like that now? Tell me, did you find it funny? Nerdy little Benji, with a crush on you? Or did you just think it was gross?”

“Oh, no. Benji… I'm so sorry.” Ethan wanted to shoot himself in the head.

“I really don’t care. Piss off, Ethan.”

“Please! Please. I thought you wanted to leave. But… this wasn’t what you were saying, was it?”

Benji didn’t say anything. He looked scared. He looked furious.

Ethan started speaking. His voice was shaking.

“It’s always been too good to be true, working with you. In Moscow, in Vienna, everywhere, I knew one day you’d get sick of it and leave. You’re the kindest, cleverest person I know. Why on earth would you stay? You could do anything. You can do anything. You deserve better. When I heard you, I thought you’d decided you’d had enough. I mean, what else would it be? So I… I wanted to make it easier for you. I acted like a dick and pushed you away and told myself it was for your own good. Because it was easier than admit how much it hurt. Because I don’t want to do this without you. I don’t want to live without you. And I… I can’t tell you how sorry I am that I hurt you.”

Ethan took a deep breath.

“I understand if you don’t feel the same way anymore. But… I love you, Benji.”

“Do you mean that?” Benji’s voice was strangled. “Or is this a sick fucking joke?”

“It’s not.”

He’d have done anything to prove it.

“Could you get out? I need… I need some time.”

“Of course. I’m so sorry, Benji.”

Ethan left the room, and wiped his tears away. He didn’t get to cry. Not when he’d earned every bite of that pain.

***

The plane landed smoothly in DC, just as the sun went down and the sky turned pink. Ethan and Benji were sitting next to each other. They hadn’t spoken once during the flight. Ethan knew he deserved it.

Once the doors opened, Ethan rose and handed Benji his bag. They left the plane and went through custom, only to pause awkwardly just outside the airport entrance.

“Come home safely, Benji.”

“No.”

“I’m sorry?”

“I don’t want to go home. I want you to take me out, and get so drunk that I can forget the whole week. And then, I want you to tell me again that you love me.”

Ethan wanted to cry.

“Alright.”

Benji took his hand, and led him into the night.


End file.
